handsome but dumb


is what my family members affectionately describe as my grandfather in his youth

but intelligence is not a precursor to pain

when he comes to visit, he checks the shoes on the rack for comfort and size

knowing that there was a time when he lacked the very choice and luxury

and that to me is so symbolic

not antinatalist like me but instead preventing the same pain while celebrating the next generation

somehow I feel differently

the bitter taste of trauma and worry and discomfort

is what I would wish upon anyone

because from pain breeds

humility

generosity

humor

and most of all, a love for the terrible human condition.

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